Daily Stormer The Most Censored Publication in History
I called my lawyer’s Canadian-Chinese real estate agent and Manitoba real estate mogul and asked him if he would be willing to stream Elden Ring on game day.
He said “no, no can play game, cannot criticize, game play critic cutting like swift blade through the wild spirt of joyful contentedness. Stream Cyberpunk bring bad spirit of distasteful agony.”
I then threatened to turn him over to Canadian mounted police for his financial support for the trucker protest, which I heard was in the six figures. I said: “they’re going to kill your dog, Leo.”
“Foolishness, laowai. Fong Leo eat dog more recently, heartily enjoy a delicious taste,” he replied.
“Leo, they’re going to ride horses into your house and trample you – they will smash up the statues of your ancestors under the hooves of their mighty steeds. All it takes is a phone call,” I explained.
Long pause.
“Your terms are acceptable.”
And so it was that Leo Fong agreed to stream Elden Ring on game day.
We don’t have a time yet. I had to pay $16,000 to Elon Musk to broadcast 5G from outer space to his remote mountainous estate in order for the download to go faster than 15 kb/s.
We still don’t know how it will be streamed or at what time. But it will probably be afternoon on Thursday.
Leo has agreed to no practice. No turning on Dark Souls to remember the controls. He’s going in clean.
It’s going to be a disaster.
Stay tuned for time information.
It will presumably be on Entropy, because that’s the only thing I think will work.
Note: I didn’t really threaten to turn him in to the mounties. I would never turn anyone in to anyone. That is just a joke. What I did do was threaten to post a video of him boiling a dog alive, which would seriously affect his rental business.
Anyway, stay tuned for details.
It probably won’t be recorded, unless someone else records it.
From what I’m able to tell, it is the sort of thing that should not be recorded, and should instead be lost to time.
