Andrew Anglin
Daily Stormer
May 9, 2017

“I actually used to eat a lot of donkey meat when I lived in China. It is a delicious and totally underrated meat. I don’t know why it’s the symbol of a political party in a country that knows nothing of it’s delicious flavor.” -Andrew Anglin 2017

The democrats have a real mess on their hands.

So do the Republicans, of course. But they’re the new Democrats.

The Hill gives us a list of 43 people who might run in 2020.

Let’s consider them, one by one.

Former Vice President Joe Biden: Biden, 74, said he “regretted” not running in 2016. He stoked major speculation about 2020 with a busy travel schedule but later said, “Guys, I’m not running!”

We know that guy.

The pervert.

Can’t win. Good chance they’ll run him though.

Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.): Sanders, 75, emerged as a leader on the left after his 2016 presidential run, and he’s working with the Democratic National Committee to help unite the party. He wouldn’t rule out a 2020 run but said in January it’s “much too early” to discuss another bid.

This Jew has to be too old.

But he’s like, the only popular figure the party has.

Though colored folk won’t vote for him, and everyone knows that.

Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass.): Warren, 67, has become one of the biggest thorns in Trump’s side. In an April interview, Warren said she has no plans to run in 2020 and is focused on her 2018 reelection.

Claims to be an Indian, but colored people see yet another naggy old white woman (that’s what I see too – I wanna see her 23andMe).

She’s definitely going to run. Might get the nomination. Politics is so much about ideology, they feel they have an obligation, after the first monkey President, to force-meme a hag into office.

Sen. Kamala Harris (D-Calif.): Harris, 52, has been in the Senate for just four months, but the rising star is already floated as a potential contender. The former California attorney general said she’s not thinking about future campaigns.

Hey, they won with a random edgy nigger once.

Maybe they can do it again, and also check the hag box.

Sen. Chris Murphy (D-Conn.): The vocal gun control advocate has been another strong Trump critic. The White House reportedly asked consultants to look into Murphy, 43, and four other possible Trump challengers.

I don’t even know who this is.

Seems like a homo though.

“First cock-gobbling faggot” is another box that needs checked.

Sen. Amy Klobuchar (D-Minn.): Klobuchar, 56, is running for reelection next year, but she stoked major speculation with her plans to travel to Iowa, a crucial state on the primary schedule, this weekend.

Dunno who that is.

Facebook CEO and founder Mark Zuckerberg: Zuckerberg, 32, who also co-founded an immigration advocacy organization, created some buzz when he said he’ll visit all 50 states this year.

HAHAHAHAHAHA

THEY’VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT THIS A LOT.

It might actually work, I guess.

Sen. Cory Booker (D-N.J.): Booker’s meteoric rise from a mayor of Newark, N.J., to U.S. senator has prompted speculation about a future run for president. While Booker, 48, won’t discuss future plans, he didn’t rule it out, either.

He’s the closest thing they’ve got to an Obama-tier Magic Mulatto.

People don’t seem to like him generally though.

Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand (D-N.Y.): Gillibrand, Clinton’s Senate successor in 2009, earned Democratic cred by leading the Senate Democrats in votes against confirming Trump’s Cabinet nominees. But Gillibrand, 50, says she’s focused on her 2018 reelection campaign and recently ruled out a 2020 run.

Dunno who that is.

Colorado Gov. John Hickenlooper: Hickenlooper, 65, who was on Clinton’s vice presidential shortlist, has been floated. He told the Denver Post that he’s not running for president.

Standard fucking white male.

Not possible.

New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo: Cuomo, 59, is running for reelection in 2018, but he hired two fundraisers from Florida, a sign that he could be considering a presidential run.

He’ll probably run.

Won’t get the nomination.

He’s a non-standard white male, but still impossible.

Former Maryland Gov. Martin O’Malley: O’Malley, 54, didn’t gain much traction in his 2016 run, but he’s already testing the waters again. A political action committee affiliated with him polled Democratic caucus voters in Iowa, and he visited New Hampshire in April.

Another standard fucking white male.

People hate him.

Former Housing and Urban Development Secretary Julián Castro: Castro, 42, was on Clinton’s vice presidential shortlist. The former San Antonio mayor drew national attention for his 2012 Democratic National Convention speech.

He’ll run for sure.

Would not be at all surprised to see him as Warren’s VP pick.

Sen. Tim Kaine (D-Va.): Kaine, 59, grew his profile as Clinton’s running mate. After the election, Kaine ruled out running for president or vice president in 2020. He’s up for reelection in 2018.

Already a loser.

Can’t come back from that.

Also, people hate him because of his Joker face.

Sen. Al Franken (D-Minn.): Franken, 65, emerged as a tough critic during the confirmation hearings for Trump’s Cabinet picks. In an interview, he said he’s not running, noting that senators generally don’t fare well running for president.

Too sterotypically annoyingly Jewish.

I can’t see it.

I guess it’s edgy that he’s a former comedian.

He’ll probably run.

Sen. Sherrod Brown (D-Ohio): Brown, 64, was on Clinton’s running mate shortlist. He could face a tough reelection in 2018, though, after Trump won his state in 2016.

Stupid comment, Hill.

GOP is going to get slaughtered in the midterms.

But no one likes Sherrod Brown. They’ve been pushing this guy forever. No appeal.

Or rather, only appeal is that he looks like he would show up as some kind of crooked doer-of-something on Breaking Bad.

Former Massachusetts Gov. Deval Patrick: Patrick, 60, left office in 2015 and now works at Bain Capital. He’s been previously floated as a presidential contender and is close with a former top Obama adviser, David Axelrod.

High-functioning Negroid.

It could be done.

New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio: De Blasio, 55, is running for reelection this year. His political prospects have been buoyed by the news that he won’t face charges in a federal investigation into his 2013 campaign fundraising.

HAHAHAHAHAHA

DO IT, FAGGOT.

Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban: The billionaire businessman and “Shark Tank” star frequently clashed with Trump in 2016 and endorsed Clinton. Cuban, 58, has said “we will see” about whether he runs for president.

HAHAHAHAHA

“”

Environmental activist Tom Steyer: The billionaire donor, 59, who runs a climate change advocacy group, is considered a possible candidate for California governor in 2018.

Yeah, the Democrats as climate-controllers is a dead end.

It’s all about what you can gibs colored people now.

Also, standard fucking white male again.

Democratic National Committee Chairman Tom Perez: The former Labor secretary, 55, was elected head of the national party this year and is looking to rebuild after the 2016 elections.

People hate this guy.

Speaks Spanish though.

Minnesota Gov. Mark Dayton: Dayton, 70, was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer but plans to finish out his term, which ends in 2018.

No way he’ll run.

Virginia Gov. Terry McAuliffe: The term-limited governor will be out of office in January 2018. McAuliffe, 60, is a well-connected ally of both Bill and Hillary Clinton and a former DNC chairman.

This list is just getting boring now.

Did they order it from most to least likely, in their Hill minds?

California Lt. Gov. Gavin Newsom: Newsom, 49, launched an early 2018 bid for California governor. He’s said being president seems “like the most miserable job in the world.”

NOPE.

Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg: Sandberg, 47, drew praise for her book “Lean In,” which discusses women in the workforce, but she has said she won’t run and will “continue to say no.”

Another Facebook Jew – but a woman.

Dunno. Sees stupid. Why is she on this list?

Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz: Schultz, 63, is stepping down from his role and will be executive chairman. He was urged by friend to run in 2016, but he endorsed Clinton.

lol yeah, run that Jew.

Honestly, he could probably force his way onto the ticket if he wanted to.

Former first lady Michelle Obama: The former first lady proved a formidable campaigner for Clinton in 2016, but Obama, 53, and others close to her have said she won’t run for elected office.

I’d vote for him.

Probably most likely to beat Trump.

Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson: The wrestler and star of the “Fast and the Furious” film franchise has flirted with running for office. A registered Republican, Johnson, 45, spoke at the party’s convention in 2000, but documentary filmmaker Michael Moore has urged him to run. One potential political ally: Warren, who has described herself as a fan of Johnson’s HBO show “Ballers.”

HMMMMM

I’m a big Fast and Furious guy.

But I’d prefer Kurt Russell or that British guy that people always tell me I look like even though I don’t at all.

I’d also vote for that Puerto Rican dyke if she was running against Trump.

Rep. Tulsi Gabbard (D-Hawaii): Gabbard, 36, hasn’t been afraid to buck her party. She drew scrutiny for secretly meeting with Syrian President Bashar Assad and criticizing the U.S. strike on Syria following Assad’s alleged use of chemical weapons on civilians.

I’d vote for Tulsi against Trump.

But no way in hell she’s getting the nomination. She’ll get Jewed like Bernie did.

No no war candidates allowed.

Rep. Keith Ellison (D-Minn.): Ellison, 53, was a prominent Sanders supporter and was a leading contender for DNC chairman before losing to Perez. He now serves as the DNC’s deputy chairman.

Ellison is the official Daily Stormer pick, because he might not be 1488 but he is 100% GTK.

Would vote.

Won’t possibly make it though because he hates the Jews and calls for blacks to separate.

Rep. Sean Patrick Maloney (D-N.Y.): Maloney, 50, considered a bid to lead the House Democrats’ campaign arm this cycle, but passed. He wrote Democrats’ autopsy on the 2016 elections.

I…. don’t think I know who that is.

California Gov. Jerry Brown: Brown, whose term is up in 2018, doesn’t think he’ll run for office again, but wouldn’t rule it out. Brown, 79, has run for president three times.

Could check the fag box.

Media mogul Oprah Winfrey: Winfrey, 63, who endorsed Clinton, is frequently floated for president but has said she will “never” run.

LOL

She’d be fun in the debates.

But srsly, this list is stupid.

Former Sen. Russ Feingold (D-Wis.): Feingold, 64, served in the Senate from 1993 to 2011, but he lost a comeback bid in 2016. He considered a presidential run in 2008.

No way, shouldn’t be on list.

Former Vermont Gov. Howard Dean: Dean, 68, unsuccessfully ran for president in 2004. Dean, whose tenure as DNC chairman from 2005 to 2009 was marked by its successful “50 States Strategy,” briefly ran for DNC chair this year before dropping out.

This guy ruined his career by screaming. He’s now known for bizarre, aggro tweeting.

Why on list?

Former Vice President Al Gore: Gore, 69, who lost the 2000 presidential election after a Supreme Court decision, reemerged in politics when stumping for Clinton last year.

LOL YES.

BRING BAAAAAAACK GORE!

2000 WAS THEFT!

Actually, we might not even need to elect him.

We could just call for another Florida recount.

Sen. Mark Warner (D-Va.): Warner, 62, ruled out a 2020 run: “I think that window is probably shut.”

Dunno who that is.

Former Sen. Jim Webb (D-Va.): Webb ran for the Democratic nomination in 2016 but dropped out after only polling in the single digits. He briefly weighed running as an independent. Since the 2016 race, Webb, 71, has pitched himself as a politician who can understand the white working-class voters who are flocking to Trump.

That’s not a good pitch.

No way he’ll bother running.

Los Angeles Mayor Eric Garcetti: Garcetti, 46, is considering a 2018 bid for California governor, but The New York Times reported that national donors have urged him to run for president.

Mexican Jew.

He’s a guy the media could just force-meme into a Christ figure overnight like they did with Obama.

Rep. Seth Moulton (D-Mass.): Moulton, an Iraq War veteran, was also mentioned in the New York Times story and privately says he’s not ruling out a bid. Moulton, 38, brushed aside the story but is fundraising off of it anyway.

Dunno who that is.

New Orleans Mayor Mitch Landrieu: Landrieu, 56, called the a New York Times story about him considering a run “hysterical.” He gained notoriety after defending the removal of Confederate memorials in New Orleans.

No way.

His mouth is too weird.

Plus, I think Democrats have already figured out that this “standard fucking white male who panders to minorities like it’s free handjob day in Jerkistan” doesn’t sell well at all.

Sen. Tammy Duckworth (D-Ill.): Duckworth, 49, recently made the switch from the House to the Senate. She’s an Iraq War veteran and lost both of her legs while serving as a Army helicopter pilot during the war.

HAHAHAHA

MADAM PRESIDENT NO-LEGS!

GREAAAAAAT!

I’d actually vote for her just for the history book lulz.

“In 2020, fed up with Donald Trump’s shilling, Americans elected a legless Thai woman, because they thought it was teh lulz. That’s when Russia finally decided to just invade and get it over with.”

Or, actually, I guess the history books will say: “В 2020 году, сытый по горло шиллингом Дональда Трампа, американцы избрали безножную тайскую женщину, потому что они думали, что это был лулз. Именно тогда Россия окончательно решила просто вторгнуться и покончить с этим.”

лулз

Washington Gov. Jay Inslee: The two-term governor was a congressman for more than a decade. Inslee, 66, played a role in his state’s lawsuit against Trump’s travel ban.

Well.

He looks like he could lead S.H.I.E.L.D.

That’s good I guess.

But srsly.

Why on list?

Bottom Line

The Democrats will probably go with Warren and Booker. Probably with Warren leading the ticket.

That is my feeling.

It doesn’t really matter.

Could be a funny show.

But Trump is going to win a second term.

We’re going to be in some kind of war, probably after some major terrorist attack that the wrong people get blamed for. It will involve Russia, but probably won’t escalate to WWIII by the end of the first term.