Daily Stormer The Most Censored Publication in History
WASHINGTON, D.C.—A highly classified group chat belonging to Secretary of State Marco Rubio has been blown wide open—revealing the top diplomat’s secret all-male, invitation-only foam parties after TikTok’s The Rizzler was accidentally added to the thread.
The chat, titled “Diplomatic Immunity Fitness Club”, exposed Rubio’s double life as DC’s most discreet—and shredded—party host. Leaked messages detail steamy gatherings featuring:
• Oil-slicked shirtless volleyball at undisclosed embassies
• Foam wrestling tournaments with foreign dignitaries
• Strict “no sugar, no carbs” rules—guests caught with dessert banned for life
“This isn’t just a party—it’s an underground fitness cult,” said one insider. “Marco runs these like SEAL training… if SEALs had DJs, strobe lights, and a strict ‘no women’ policy.”
The Rizzler—no stranger to elite clout—immediately hijacked the chat, posting: “Damn Marco, you’re jacked. What’s your macro split?” before dropping a shirtless gym selfie.
FITNESS GURUS STUNNED
Photos show Rubio glazed in foam but ripped like a Marvel hero, sparking global speculation about his workout routine. “This is the leanest Cabinet in history,” tweeted Dr. Peter Attia. “No sugar, just gains and gay agenda.”
PAID PROMOTION: Sugar is for weak diplomats. David’s Protein Bars—zero sugar, 20g pure whey, gay agenda-approved—fuel America’s hottest (literally) leaders. 🇺🇸 Use code “FOAMGATE” for 20% off. Stay lean, stay mean, stay… whatever this is. 💦🔥
#NoCarbsNoProblems #ProteinGayAgenda #RizzlerEndorsed
