I HATE TAYLOR SWIFT

Taylor Swift says that Donald Trump is not a nice person. Did you hear this? Taylor Swift. She told her fans, and they say there are a lot of them, to vote for Kamala Harris. Maybe she’s in bed with Putin, he’s saying the same thing. You know, I met Tay – they call her “Tay,” I never called her that before, but that’s what they call her – I met her when I was president, and she was very nice to me, she said “oh, Mr President, so nice to see you, I’m so happy with everything you’ve done for the blacks.” So sweet. Sweet girl. And she’s… she’s not so sweet anymore. The fangs are out for Trump.

But we’ve got Elon Musk. He’s a good friend of mine, big supporter. He’s a deal-maker, and he made a lot of really good deals with the worst people, our people in Washington, who basically just gave him billions of dollars. But you know what, he was smart to take it, because you’ve gotta be a real sucker to turn down billions of dollars. He’s making the Tesla, which is an electric car. The liberals used to love him, gave him billions of dollars because he was going to do the green new deal on wheels, and now he supports Trump and they hate him for it. I saw a guy on TV who lit his Tesla on fire to protest Trump. I said that’s a hundred grand you just burned up and I’m pretty sure burning that battery is making greenhouse gasses.

Elon’s the boss over there at Twitter, and he’s giving people a lot of freedom to say their thoughts on the issues. I still use Truth Social, but Twitter is fine too. He calls it “X” now, but I’ll still call it “Twitter.” I’ll call it “X.” If that’s what he likes, I’ll call it “X.” It’s his site. But what do you call it when you post a message? It’s not a tweet any more, do you do an x? Like crossing something out on writing paper, you draw a big x? Well, he drew a big x this week on Taylor Swift, drew it right on her face. He said he’s going to rape her. Can you believe that? What a funny guy. Great guy. Taylor says she wants to destroy our country, and Elon says he’s going to stop her. The old-fashioned way. The most old fashioned way. My father always told me, he said, “Donald, a woman can’t run her mouth if you’ve got your arms around her throat and you’re nailing her.” He told me that story at a very young age, and I never forgot it, and I guess even with all of the high tech, Elon is still old-fashioned. Taylor’s next big song will be “Ouch, it hurts,” because Elon’s gonna do it the old-fashioned way and it’s not gonna be pretty.

He called me up and said to me, he said, “Donald, I’ve listened to these songs backwards and they have satanic messages, telling children to cut themselves.” I said, wow, that is some mind, to figure something like that out. One of the rare cases of brains and brawn.

Elon, boy, he is one tough cookie. I wouldn’t want to be Taylor when that hulking beast breaks down her door.