Just last week, my three-year-old child asked me: “where is the poop cereal for my gay asshole?”
Finally, Kellogg’s is releasing a poop cereal for children with gay assholes.
In what is perhaps the most unappetizing headline of 2021, the Weekly Metro announced that “Kellogg’s new LGBTQ cereal wants to fill your mouth with pride,” because everything must be gay now and the virtue must be signaled. Big Business has realized that there is a lot of money in wrapping yourself in the rainbow flag, and so as “Pride Month” (yes, an entire month) grows closer, corporate social media avatars, ATMs, and business signs will suddenly be bedecked in rainbows.
Kellogg’s, which has traditionally been known for its cartoon animals, is partnering with GLAAD (Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation) to release a new cereal called “Together With Pride,” which will hit the shelves next month and cost $4 per purple box — $3 of which will go to GLAAD. The cereal itself will feature rainbow-colored cereal in the shape of hearts and edible glitter. Kellogg’s, which has partnered with GLAAD at least once previously, has featured nearly all of its famous cartoon characters on the box.
“We believe that all young people and those young at heart deserve an environment where they can grow up to be their best selves,” the caption on the box reads. “That’s why we’ve joined forces with GLAAD by going purple on Spirit Day to stand up against bullying in all forms, and support a more accepting world for LGBTQ youth.” It goes without saying that this sort of publicity stunt also allows Kellogg’s to pose as being on The Right Side of History as opposed to merely a breakfast cereal — and it is important, apparently, for children to think deeply about gay issues at breakfast.
In fact, Kellogg’s went above and beyond to ensure that your kids can go woke just after waking. On the side of the box, children are asked to choose their pronouns, with options like “he/him,” “she/her,” and “they/them,” which, if you haven’t been keeping up, isn’t plural so much as “nonbinary” or just bewildered. There are also some helpful blanks spaces in case you want to fill in your own, because at this stage in the revolution we’re just making stuff up and everyone has to go along with it. (I’m not kidding. One clever teen chose “His Majesty” as his preferred pronoun.)
It doesn’t just taste like a normal rimjob – it’s a tranny rimjob.
What a beautiful signal to butthole children and their disease-riddled gay anuses.
Woke corporation alert: @KelloggsUS has released a new woke cereal so kids can get a big dose of leftist propaganda in the morning to go along with their sugary bowl of cereal. If you want them to leave our kids alone then you have a duty to stop giving Kellogg’s your $! pic.twitter.com/XZ0sEdc8um
— Robby Starbuck (@robbystarbuck) May 13, 2021
But seriously though: parents have to buy this for their children. Can you imagine giving your child gay anal rimjob cereal with pronouns on it?
Who would do that, I wonder?
Yeah: it’s not a mystery. Single moms are the ones propagandizing their children to become homosexuals. Also, if the house has a weak father, the mother will also try to get the child to become a poop-eater.
Honestly, I wonder if God didn’t design women to die during childbirth. The only purpose of a woman is to give birth to children, and after the children are born, all they do is try to hurt them.
Frankly, if you feed your children this garbage, you might as well be injecting them with the tranny hormones yourself.
It’s not a coincidence that it’s “breakfast cereal” that is propagandizing your children to go full anal. This garbage is poison.
Breakfast really is the most important meal of the day, and the Breakfast of Champions is the same thing it always was:
Cooking is one of the single most important things you can do for children. In fact, in the larger scheme of things, it probably is the single most important thing you can do for a child.
Children can get over psychological and physical abuse of all kinds as they become adults. Everyone these days has to work through childhood difficulties. What you can’t ever get over is having a completely destroyed hormonal system from being fed processed garbage during your formative years as a child.
I was talking to someone the other day about the fact that George P. Bush – Jeb Bush’s Mexican son – is the single most BASED member of the Bush family. The conclusion we came to is that he grew up in a household with a Mexican mother who without question cooked him actual food.
Now, you’d think that in rich or elite households, parents are feeding their kids healthful food. You would think that, but it just actually isn’t true. Most people eat garbage food – even the rich.
You saw the way Donald Trump was eating fast food every day. The rest of the billionaires are the same. Bill Gates and Warren Buffett are known for living on McDonald’s.
Gates is trying to force the world to go vegan, so he seems to have been avoiding being photographed eating meat for the last several years, but you can still catch him out drinking sugar water like some slob from the trailer park.
Maybe Mark Zuckerberg doesn’t count because he’s weird, but every time this guy is seen in public he’s scarfing down some fried crap.
Historically, the rich ate better because meat was expensive and also gourmet cooking meant something. Now, the single most delicious thing anyone can get is some processed crap served in plastic for $4.99.
(This speaks to a larger issue of the fact that being rich doesn’t really mean anything anymore, which I’ve talked about before. Rich people also use the same phones and computers, taking up most of their day, that peasants use, and I don’t think the difference between the cotton at H&M and the cotton at Gucci is really that big. It’s an interesting topic, but it’s not the point I’m trying to make – just wanted to make a note.)
This might be the most desperate, cringe inducing attempt I’ve seen to sell the vaccine to people. Embarrassing. pic.twitter.com/3vWoF1SYzD
— Robby Starbuck (@robbystarbuck) May 13, 2021
Point being: the upper middle class, the rich, and even the elite eat crap and end up feeding it to their kids, which is leading to a total faggotization of everything.
Boys need meat. They do not need sugar, really ever. I know kids like it, but they will thank you for limiting it.
It’s one thing I always thank my parents for: my mother was autistic about food during my formative years. I was allowed to eat McDonald’s maybe twice a month, and then I could only get some little thing and couldn’t get any refills on the soda pop. Truly, this is the greatest thing anyone has ever done for me. The greatest gift. People ask how I get jacked easily and seem to not ever get fat: the biggest reason is that I have a healthy framework for my endocrine system, which is much better than 99% of the white population.
Brown people (excluding the blacks) are less gay, stronger willed, and so on, primarily because they have mothers that cook real food. That is also why their women tend to be more traditional.
Biology is the foundation of culture. We should protect our biology, and that of our children.
Eat right!