The social interaction licenses are really going to be a thing.
If people from different households are banned from hugging or kissing during weddings because of a virus, the logical next step is to also ban them from hugging and kissing anywhere else, because the virus is everywhere.
Of course, we know that coronavirus is about as dangerous as the flu, so the government is clearly running some kind of sick social-engineering program on people.
Fathers cannot walk their daughter arm-in-arm down the aisle and couples must wash their hands before and after exchanging rings in post-lockdown weddings.
New rules issued by the Government today also ban receptions when the ceremonies are allowed to restart with up to 30 people in England from Saturday.
The plans are intend to maintain social distancing at weddings as the coronavirus pandemic continues but will reduce the big day to little more than a formality.
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Here are some of the new rules which will make for very different weddings:
CEREMONIES – Keep distanced during ‘short’ ceremonies
The new rules urge people from different households to maintain social distancing between one another, which will be ‘one metre plus’ from Saturday.
They say this ‘may require marriages or civil partnerships to be adapted to remove practices that would otherwise have brought people into contact with one another, unless required for the marriage or civil partnership to be legally binding’.
The guidance adds that ‘where this is the case precautions should be put in place to minimise contact and ensure the timeframe is as short as possible’.
This means that fathers will be unable to walk their daughter arm-in-arm down the aisle – and people from different households will be banned from hugging or kissing.
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RECEPTIONS – Maximum of only two households indoors
The Government has asked that the number of attendees at the service should ‘ideally be kept to a minimum as far as possible’, but will allow up to 30 to attend.
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DURING THE SERVICE – No singing or shouting allowed
Meanwhile people have been told to avoid ‘singing, shouting, raising voices and/or playing music at a volume that makes normal conversation difficult’.
This is because of the potential for encouraging shouting which would raise an increased risk of transmission of Covid-19 from aerosol and droplets.
It means spoken responses ‘should also not be in a raised voice’ – and singing and playing of instruments that are blown into should be avoided.
If it is required for a ceremony, one person should be allowed to sing or chant, and the ‘use of plexi-glass screens should be considered to protect guests’.
The Government has suggested couples consider using recordings instead of singing. Organs are also allowed but must be cleaned before and after.
All guests should follow social distancing guidance – and venues should look at changing seating layouts, improve ventilation and use face coverings.
There’s a couple more rules, but you get the idea. It’s absolute lunacy.
The thing about these “people banned from doing X under Y circumstance because of the virus” rules is that they’re a kind of smooth introduction to the total banning of “X.” We saw this happen with the lockdown, which was introduced bit by bit and repeatedly extended until everyone grew used to it.
What is going to happen is that they’re going to ban people from different households from doing these things, such as hugging and kissing, in every context. They’re introducing the banning little by little, just like they introduced the now eternal lockdown as something that would only last a few weeks.