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This is the one scheme that might actually work.
If anyone started messing with my French fries, I would just surrender. jk, I’m paleo/keto and don’t eat garbage. But most people on earth can’t tolerate a lack of fries.
The head of the company now running the former McDonald’s Corp chain of restaurants in Russia told RBC TV that producers of French fries are refusing to supply to the country and warned that attempts to increase domestic processing are fraught with difficulties.
McDonald’s quit Russia after a Western backlash against Moscow’s military campaign in Ukraine, which included a barrage of economic sanctions, and sold all the restaurants it owned to a local licensee in May.
Restaurants began opening under the new name Vkusno & tochka, or “Tasty and that’s it”, on June 12. CEO Oleg Paroev told Reuters the chain had sold almost 120,000 burgers on opening day.
The new ownership was keen to stress that high quality standards would be maintained or even bettered, and that consumers would not notice much difference. It has since been forced to admit that it is facing a shortage of French fries until autumn, blaming a poor harvest in Russia and supply chain woes.
“What has happened now is that due to well known events many foreign companies, I would even say all major producers of fries, have refused to deliver this product to Russia,” Paroev told RBC TV, a business channel, late on Thursday.
I mean, Russia has potatoes. I think maybe a lot of them come from Kazakhstan, but they have a lot of potatoes in Russia. I don’t think they have as many of the big types of potatoes you need to make French fries, but they could do wedges, right?
Wedges are better anyway.
Just in case anyone doesn’t know the context here – McDonald’s canceled Russia, so Russia seized their assets and turned every McDonald’s into an “Uncle Vanya’s.” The letter “V” in Cyrillic looks like a capital “B,” so they just turned the arch sideways.
They’re still selling the same food as McDonald’s, because they seized all their cooking equipment.
It’s really one of the funniest trolls ever.
But they’ve gotta keep those fries flowing.
Standard Russian potato dishes look like this:
And even drunk bar food is usually wedges. I never actually thought about Russia not being able to produce potatoes large enough to make the long fries, because why would anyone ever think about that.
I can’t find a global map of potato sizes, but here’s a map showing global potato production – a third of all potatoes come from China.
I guess serving wedges at fake McDonald’s might be some kind of symbolic defeat. So I suppose I agree that Russia needs to find a source for long potatoes, even though wedges really are better.
