Aquaman Goes Whale-Hunting, Photobombs Normie Couples’ Wedding

Roy Batty
Daily Stormer
December 26, 2018

First off, no man should ever wife-up a woman who is fatter than him. This woman looks a bit… full. But hey, by American standards, I guess she’s below average BMI. No wonder the guy decided to put a ring on it. And the flowers are pretty trad, I guess.

Okay, so with that out of the way, we get to the elephant in the room (no, not her) and discuss the photobombing.

Republic:

Hollywood actor Jason Momoa who has been winning hearts with his performance in DC’s latest venture ‘Aquaman’, has won over the Internet all over again as a surprised a bride and a groom by his impromptu appearance at a beach wedding in Oahu.

The pictures of the 39-year-old actor, dressed in striped board shorts, playfully nudging the bride and groom with his Aquaman trident, is going viral on the internet as fans are overwhelmed by his out of the box move.

As per media reports, Jason Momoa and his associates were at the beach when the newlyweds were conducting their wedding photo shoot on the rocks beside the sea on Thursday, December 20. Mamoa and his troop reportedly congratulated the couple after spotting them and Mamoa, who seems to be very down to earth happily agreed to pose for the couple. Moreover, he reportedly borrowed the trident from a kid on the beach and went behind the couple in their picture and pretended to be a sasquatch. 

Mhmm, sure. What a coincidence. Not a viral marketing campaign at all, lemme assure you.

But we’ll get back to that.

Now, I understand that some normies are actually thrilled by the idea that a (semi)famous celebrity would show up to their wedding.

But they shouldn’t be.

Because it’s basic one-upsmanship. That Aquaman/Khal Drogo showed up to your wedding means that all the attention is going to be on him, not you.

Since women are attracted to fame like salmon are to bears, that means that your soon-to-be wife is gushing over a dude who has more fame game going for him than you. Which, like, in a healthy society, you can tolerate a bit of that. But if you’ve managed to find a woman you can get your arms around in both the metaphorical and literal sense in modern-day America… well, you gotta keep that shit on lock-down.

That means no celebrities showing up to play songs at your wedding, or showing up in your photos.

And so much for the timelessness of marriage and tradition and all that.

If you have a dude from a capeshit movie that no one is even going to remember in 3 years showing up in all your photos, that’s not going to age well. It’s like a tattoo – relevant and interesting in the moment, but not really a good long-term investment.

Personally, I’m sure the couple didn’t even know who Aquaman was and thought some random hobo with a man-bun wanted to be in their wedding photos with a trident. They just rolled with it because, as the article states, he had his gang with him and they didn’t want to cause a scene.

In other words, this is yet another case of a random celebrity insisting on photobombing a hapless normal American couples’ wedding photo.

These celebs have no shame with their viral marketing campaigns. 

But we all know that regular Americans are sick and tired of Hollywood and Jewish propaganda being shoved in their mouths 24/7.

Even when they’re trying to do something trad and wholesome like wife-ing up a moderately healthy woman on a remote Pacific island, these Hollywood celebs insist on hounding them down and forcing themselves back into their lives.

It is literally an epidemic at this point.

And it’s always Hollywood’s men that happen to be strolling by, dressed all casual-like.

I think they’re actively trying to kike the grooms. 

Not content on churning out anti-natal propaganda, the Jews are sending their boy-toys out to weddings to try and subvert the goyim more directly if the propaganda fails.

I don’t know what the solution to this problem is, but we need to find one fast.