Ebonics 101

Daily Stormer
February 27, 2014

Make sure you have a pencil and paper handy. The following important lesson is found on the educational web-site Ebonics-Translator. Before you get all racist please carefully read the website “disclaimer” and understand that this lesson is not intended to just be entirely humorous, it is also educational.

Disclaimer: This Web-site is an Ebonics related entertainment site. This site deals with positive information regarding Ebonics, but also shows the humorous side, too. This site is not designed to be racist, but purely to help bring awareness that Ebonics is a language and Black people continue to create new words that are now included in mainstream dictionaries. It’s okay to laugh and also okay to learn!

Learning the language of Ebonics is a very big step in bridging the gap between the Black and White races (which are not really races – they are actually the exact same race with two different skin colors. “Race” is only skin deep).

If you think that Blacks are different than Whites, or that they “talk funny,” then you are most likely a Nazi who wants to kill six million of them. They just have a different language, that’s all.

Ebonics originated in the American South, or maybe the trans-atlantic slave trade, or maybe it is a mixture of African dialects, or a mixture of British dialects – nobody is quite sure (it doesn’t have anything to do with Blacks not being capable of speaking properly though, that’s for sure).

Ebonics was defined in 1975 by African-American social psychologist Dr. Robert Williams in his book Ebonics: The True Language of Black Folks:

…linguistic and paralinguistic features which on a concentric continuum represent the communicative competence of the West African, Caribbean, and United States slave descendant of African origin.

It is clear that Ebonics does not correlate with low intelligence, given all of the big words in that definition.

Besides, it’s pretty much federally mandated that we teach Ebonics in school now, due to the precedent setting Ann Arbor case of 1979,  so we might as well start learning now. Boy, integration sure is fun!

Welcome to Ebonics 101

Herein follow a few terms to help you get started on your merry way towards the ve-nak-u-lar…

“Damn- that shit is DOPE!”
That is a wonderful concept/object/action.

“Can’t FADE that.”
I am unable to comprehend or assimilate that concept at this time.

“Shante ain’t havin’ it.”
This is not something that Shante will allow to occur.

“Homey- Boo was dropping PHAT beats.”
Our friend Boo was playing some wonderful music.

“YO!- Let me GAFFLE that BLUNT!”
Might I be able to indulge in your marijuana cigarette?

“JIMMY was on and I was HITTIN’ it!”
I had in my possession a condom, which was used in my engagement of sexual activity.

“What’s up? Why you ALL UP in my shit!?!”
Please sir/madam- stay out of my affairs.

“She is HELLA’ CLOWIN’ you HOMEY!”
The woman is creatively informing you that her interest in dating you is non-existent at this time.

“Woooooo- Renaldo was PITCHIN’ STRAIGHT GAME to baby-doll, and it was SMOOOOVE!”
Renaldo was creatively inquiring as to the marital status of the female, with the intention of asking her on a date.

“STEP OFF Cool- before I bust PHAT CAPS in your A** with my NEINER…”
It would be beneficial to your physical state to leave this area, as I will soon be encouraged by your disrespect towards me to shoot bullets into your buttocks with my 9mm pistol.

“Why is 5-OH always BUGGIN’!?!”~~~~
Why are the police officers always worried?

“Friday night- COLD CHILLIN’ with a 40 and a BLUNT.”~~~~
It is Friday eve, and I am leisurely enjoying a forty ounce bottle of malt liquor and a marijuana cigarette.