Despite England’s unquenchable thirst for multiculturalism, its annual Miss England pageant has remained mostly English over the decades. Other than in 2005, when a Uzbekistani model won the title, and in 2009, when a light-skinned mulatto won the title, all of the pageant’s winners have been white.
But it’s 2018, and England is changing fast. Moslems are free to groom white schoolgirls using their Austin Powers shag wagons, terrorism is considered part and parcel of urban life, and the entire island is set to become an Islamic caliphate by Q1 2019.
With this in mind, Miss England’s judges have decided that their candidates should be women who sport a look that’s more in tune with the Middle East.
And – by Allah’s merciful light – it looks like they’ve found a good one!
A Muslim beauty queen is set to become the first Miss England contestant to compete wearing a hijab.
Maria Mahmood, 20, came runner-up in the Miss Birmingham heat and has made it through to the semi-finals of the national competition.
If she is successful, Maria will then take part in the Miss England finals, with the winner going on to represent the nation in Miss World.
Maria, an aspiring social worker, said she wanted to challenge the negative stereotypes faced by Muslims and that she wanted to ‘represent diversity and multi-multiculturalism’.
Wow. Thicc, Moslem and hijab’d? That’s three boxes ticked off right there!
Yup, I think it’s safe to assume that Maria will win the contest. Well, unless her rival is someone who’s even higher up on the diversity totem pole, such as a purebred Wakandan.
Though Finland already did that, so perhaps it’s time for something new.
She admitted she felt the weight of the responsibility she was taking on: ‘I wear a hijab, you are really wearing your Muslim identity,’ she said.
‘In today’s society we [Muslims] are not exactly loved because what is happening in the world.’
Ah, c’mon, no… that’s not true.
If Moslems weren’t loved, Bongs wouldn’t let them pour into their nation and influence society, would they?
This is not what Islamophobia looks like.
‘Growing up, I used to get bullied told that I was so ugly I should commit suicide,’ she said. ‘I wanted to show that it didn’t have to be this way.’
Maria was fast-tracked through to the final where she competed against 30 other women and was named first runner up.
‘On the day, I was very nervous. I was the only hijab-wearing person there.
‘You know when you’re nervous anyway, and then you become even more nervous because you don’t see anyone else who looks like you?’
As someone who makes regular trips to London, yes, I know that feeling.
Maria is now looking ahead to the semi-finals, which will be held in Newark, Nottinghamshire, in July.
But the contestant remains undecided on whether she is going to take part in the swimwear round.
‘I am pretty sure it is an optional round, if I felt like doing it, I would do it,’ she said. ‘But I would obviously wear something suitable to me.’
Clearly, this kebabess is bitter that she felt like an outsider while growing up, and is looking to “get back” at England – the country that housed and fed her very well – by entering this pageant and subverting its standards. Like everything these people do, it’s nothing more than an attack on Britain and its people.
And I can’t blame her for wanting to win the competition and serve her desert tribe. The real deplorables here are the British judges and administrators that allow her to do it.