Putin’s Inaugural Address was Bretty Gud

Roy Batty
Daily Stormer
May 8, 2018

My boss and official paymaster gave a great speech the other day.

I mean, I say it was great, but really it was just refreshingly normal.

I think that’s why Putin is so popular in the West nowadays.

Like, when you hear this guy speak, you’re like, “ok, that makes a lot of sense, and he seems to mean it.”

He talks about the great risks and challenges Russia faces from the West, the huge internal reforms that still need to be carried out and thanks everyone for their support and faith in him.

Again, that’s pretty solid and hard to find anything wrong with it.

I didn’t hear any cringe-worthy stuff about making the world safe for democracy or about Israel or about promoting women in the Kremlin or whatever. From the perspective of an American Nationalist, I would want a Putin running my country as well.

But boss, if I may, I have some constructive criticism to throw your way. 

Did you see the 5th of May demonstrations in St. Petersburg and Moscow?

You know, the one where all those upper-middle class hipsters and proto-SJW liberals came out onto the main roads and LARPed as Antifa or something for the cameras for like an hour?

Sending black-clad riot police with batons to herd screaming chubby school-age chicks into police vans is just a bad image, you know?

You got baited hard.

I hate to tell you this big guy, but your government has a serious image problem among Russia’s twin-city youth.

Instead of waiting until they take to the streets, and create a big PR nightmare for you, perhaps you should take a few proactive measures.

Why not encourage a patriotic youth counter-culture instead? 

For starters, you’d have to not let the big Russian internet providers cut off service to people they don’t like. Now, I understand that you and the people in the Kremlin are boomers and your first instinct is to ban anything that you don’t understand – but please, for the sake of your own image, don’t kneejerk try to ban everybody.

The kids don’t like that. They think you’re out of touch and that your shits all retarded when you let these bureacrats do shit like that.

And that goes for the liberals as well. 

Let them do their thing lol, no one cares. A bunch of soy boys and half-Jewish chicks with dyed hair aren’t going to convince anybody outside St. Petersburg and Moscow to vote for Navalny or Sobchak or whatever.

If you want to combat them, you gotta fight them online. Navalny and his people are good at the cyber. They make videos and groups in VK where they bantz you pretty good.

But the truth is, these people are complete and utter faggots and the Internet Hate Machine will make short work of them.

This is where you can really shine, President Putin. 

The Jews in the West already claim you are le epic online troll. How about actually realizing your potential and learning to use the internet instead of making the internet your enemy?

Look at what Donald Trump was able to do with his twitter:

And I know, I know, the nationalists that already exist can be a bunch of autistic spergs sometimes, yelling about how Russia should be broken up into a dozen little parts because of their “nationalism for everybody” ideology.

I get it, they’re a pain in the butt too.

But why not encourage your own? 

Let Russian chauvinists start getting some serious airtime, and let the internet trolls do their work.

Stop trying to convince the West that you’re akshully not such a bad guy. They don’t care, they’ll never listen. 

Get some new friends instead.

You can start by calling up RT and telling that Armenian dominatrix to give some Alt-Right personalities some airtime on RT America.

Give fascists a platform NOW.

You need some new friends in the West and the sooner the better. 

Also, feel free to just hire me, give me a salary, a dacha in Yalta, citizenship AND a hot personal secretary.

I’ll take it from there.

So in summary, here are some suggested action steps:

1. Stop overreacting to a bunch of school kids throwing a fit in the streets
2. Hire some Western experts like myself to troll the liberals online for you
3. Keep the Russian internet free and help out struggling Western dissidents

I’m going to be keeping my fingers crossed for a reply, Mr. President.

I check the comments sections of my articles, so if anything, feel free to reach out to me there.