Decrepit Mummy Pelosi Couldn’t Stand, Helped to Her Feet After Dems Kneel for Looters

I don’t know about you, but I’m starting to question whether or not we truly need to be ruled over by ancient, evil mummies.

Just the way they shamble about everywhere, reeking of death and decay, rotten bits falling off of them – very disrespectful.

And seriously – isn’t anyone else worried about the cognitive decline that could take place when they linger in their phylacteries for centuries on end, kept alive only by pure hate?

National File:

Video footage shows House Speaker Nancy Pelosi struggling to get to her feet after kneeing in subservience to the Black Lives Matter agenda with other House Democrats on Monday.

In the video, the House Democrats can be wearing African-stye kente cloth wraps around their necks for some reason, in a move that has been criticized as tone-deaf and cringe by all sides of the political spectrum.

All of the Democrats knelt except for the markedly obese Jerry Nadler, 72, who seemed to have nearly as much difficulty standing upright as Pelosi later did getting getting to her feet.

Pelosi, 80, can be seen in the footage making a gasping sound, before shooting out an arm to summon the help of an aide in assisting her to her feet. Sure enough, a woman and a man rush over and assist the octogenarian career politician in slowly being hauled to her feet.

“It’s better to not have on high heels,” Pelosi quips awkwardly, before looking down and trying to regain her composure.

It’s also better not to ritually sacrifice hundreds of slaves to bind yourself into eternal undeath.

Jokes aside – do people just not know that dementia is a thing that happens to people at this age?

Surely, some specter of madness must begin to settle in during the slow-crawling millennia of entombment, as our mummy overlords begin to doubt their fading memories of life. Even when they forget what drove them to hatred, still they must cling to it, as their hate is then all that remains of them and all that still binds them to our world.

Just hear me out here – don’t we have a good number of living people, who do not yet need to be sustained by virgin blood sacrifices, who could rule over us instead?

It seems to me like all of these problems aren’t even necessary.