Memetic Monday: Memorializing My Labor

Look, we’re running late today, so we’re going to have to go quick.

Let me just explain: I can never remember which is which, Labor Day or Memorial Day, so on both I just try to memorialize my labor by relaxing and not doing much work. I do work every day; I have worked every day for nearly ten years. Seriously – zero days off, except Christmas when I only write one post (but I still write the post, and then at night usually start getting jittery from not working and get a head start on stuff for the next day).

Clearly, I have days where I don’t try as hard, and sometimes finish up in a couple hours, because I have to do stuff in real life, and sometimes I need to relax. Well, Memorial/Labor day is one of the days I try to do that on purpose – not because I’m busy, but just because sometimes you should try to chill.

Over the weekend I also sort of skipped my cheat day. I was going to order a pizza and then Beardson texted me and was like “can you come on in an hour” and I was like “lol I’d better do that,” so I ate mac and cheese instead of ordering a pizza because I thought that would sober me up better and faster. So actually I did have a cheat day, because that is clearly cheating, but I didn’t have a pizza.

So today I was like “imma order a morning pizza and watch this Lord of the Rings bullshit.” Then, of course, 5 minutes in I fell asleep and didn’t wake up for many hours. I don’t yet know if the Rings of Bezos is as bad as they say, but I support this product as a sleep inducer. The first ten minutes of this show are like being hypnotized by a sleep hypnotist.

My pizza was cold when I woke up.

Here’s the Editor’s Pick of the Week:

I can’t even choose a runner-up, I just don’t have time. You pick the runner-up from one of these:

Okay, let’s go faster.

Wait, hold on, there was something else –

Here are the rest.