Michigan: On the Lookout for the Mad Pooper – He Poops in People’s Cars! Unfriendly!

Pooping in someone’s car is about the most unfriendly thing I can imagine someone doing.

Detroit Free Press:

Employees at two different Warren auto shops were shocked when they realized a random man pooped in cars that belonged to customers.

Warren police told Fox 2 Detroit (WJBK-TV) they’re on the lookout for a man, who pooped in unlocked cars at Mr. Friendly Auto Service and Twin’s Tire Service.

The man first struck at Mr. Friendly Auto Service in November, which is located at 23677 Van Dyke Ave. The manager, Chris Phillips, told Fox 2 after they realized someone used their customer’s car as a bathroom, he checked the security cameras.

According to Fox 2, the security footage showed the man grabbing sanitary napkins, opening a customer’s van and pooping inside it. The man came back again in January, but kept his pants on that time.

He’s pooping elsewhere as well.

The second incident happened Feb. 3 at Twin’s Tire Service, located at 20911 Van Dyke Ave. An employee at Twin’s Tire Service said they were fixing a van with electrical problems, so the vehicle couldn’t lock properly.

The employee said although it was unsettling, the poop froze due to cold temperatures. He was able to shovel it out of the car, which was a slightly easier cleanup. After this, the auto shop deep cleaned the car for the customer — free of charge.

Twin’s Tire Service also caught the man’s license plate on its security footage, the employee said.

Back in October, a similar incident happened in Van Buren Township. A man went into a local Meijer, pooped in an empty box and left it on a shelf.

I imagine it could be the same pooper.

We have to catch this man.

But Seriously

People are going insane, and you’re going to see a lot more pooping, a lot more other weird stuff.

I’ve explained this. The lockdown and the virus lunacy is designed to cause people to go completely insane.

Mad pooping is going to be the least of your worries when the crazy machine really ramps up.