Fun-Loving Goof Biden Calls for Regime Change in Russia, White House Immediately Denounces Him

The fun-loving goofball Joe Biden gave a speech in Poland on Saturday, calling for regime change in Russia, saying explicitly that Vladimir Putin has to be removed from power.

“For God’s sake, this man cannot remain in power.”

The White House quickly corrected him, saying that what he meant to say was that Putin has to be removed from power in the Ukraine.

Apparently expecting Biden to eventually say this, Jen Psaki preemptively said weeks ago she did not support his claims.

This call for regime change follows Joe claiming that he was sending US soldiers into the Ukraine, something which the White House also denounced as false.

Biden also said that if Russia released chemical weapons, that the US would respond by using chemical weapons.

I guess the Russians are supposed to hire highly powerful remote-viewer psychics to figure out if Biden really means what he says. Virtually everything he says of any consequence is immediately denounced by his own government as false.

The only thing of any serious relevance he’s said recently that wasn’t denounced by his own government was that there are going to be massive global food shortages, because the sanctions on Russia are actually sanctions on the entire planet.

During his big Poland speech, the lovable scamp Joe made other bizarre statements during the speech, including that there are no neo-Nazis in the Ukraine.

We didn’t get an explanation of who the neo-Nazis in Mariupol who have been slaughtering Russians in the Donbass for 8 years are. We also didn’t get an explanation of their human shields program, which involves kidnapping, starving, torturing and sometimes murdering their own civilians.

Maybe those neo-Nazis are secretly working for Russia, like when the State Department claimed that ISIS was secretly working for Assad as part of some complex triple fake-out.

Biden’s Twitter account then quoted the speech and clarified that there couldn’t be any neo-Nazis in the Ukraine, because the entire country is run by Jews.

He also claimed that Europe needs to prepare for “decades of war.”

(The White House did not denounce that statement.)

During the speech, the crowd was demanding WWIII to protect Ukrainian rights to NATO membership, chanting “close the skies.”

These chants were of course led by women who suspiciously speak perfect English.

Just before the Biden speech, Russia bombed Lviv again.

Lviv doesn’t get bombed very often at all. It was obvious this was a message.

Putin then issued a statement, saying “you better back the fuck up before you get smacked the fuck up – this is how we do it on our side.”

I’m just joking.

Putin has for whatever reason thus far failed to issue a statement quoting 2 Pac, just as the Russian Foreign Ministry has failed to post any Wojak memes or tell the “Foreign Legion” to “go back to reddit.”

I Hate to Say It…

I think I have to keep saying it: what if Russia threw a color revolution in Puerto Rico and started using it as a base, training locals to fight the US, and then started saying it was going to put nuclear weapons in the country, saying it was all about defense?

What if then the US invaded Puerto Rico, declaring that Russian troops building an army and threatening to place bombs in Puerto Rico was a threat to American security, and Putin traveled to Cuba to give a speech saying he was going to overthrow the government of the US to protect the independence of Puerto Rico?

This isn’t just an analogy, but a direct mirror parallel to what is currently happening in Eastern Europe.

The only claim that the US is able to make is that they are justified in doing this because they are morally superior to evil Russians – primarily because they support man-on-man anal ramming, as well as men eating their own semen from other men’s anuses.

I’m strongly anti-anal. I believe that in fact Russia, as a country which bases its identity on traditional European and Christian values, has the moral high-ground by a lot in any conflict between East and West.

However, I would also say that if Putin was trying to put nuclear missiles in Puerto Rico, the US would have legitimate security concerns.

Biden’s claim Saturday that NATO is “purely about defense” is just nonsensical. It’s about defense from Russia, but the only reason Russia is in the Ukraine in the first place is because the Ukraine was both attempting to join NATO and indiscriminately slaughtering people in the Donbass.