At the Center of American Politics, Rashida Tlaib Keeps Making the “I’m Taking a Shit” Face

Thrust to the center of American political life as the only Palestinian terrorist leader in Congress, Rashida Tlaib has stuck to her KISS (Keep It Simple, Stupid) strategy: “Put on very confusing glasses, wrap your stubby little mutant sausage digits around a mic with all your strength, and strain like you’re taking a massive shit.”

However, fans of the Congressjihadist have noted that there is a dynamic range to Tlaib’s shit-faces. X FORMERLY TWITTER user “Tlaib Fan 9000 (TRANS RIGHTS NOW – TOTAL JEW DEATH 2023)” has called this range “the phases of the mega-shit.”

Fans have described her as “the only terrorist politician who is willing to shit all over the capitalists.”

Despite the pushback from haters attempting to constipate her flow, Rashida remains committed to squeezing out her rage on the Jewish system of occupation, capitalism, and CIS-normativity.

Between grunting sounds during her latest speech, she declared that “Hamas is fighting for… trans kids.”

In response to the awe-inspiring speech, Rashida was tailed by a stalker, who kept saying “chopping off babies’ heads” over and over.

Rashida held strong, responding with the “crying while shitting” face.

And then…

(I don’t really remember where I was going with this.)

I’m still on my way back to the top, you see. I’ve had a difficult week, as I informed you yesterday.

See: Physical and Mental Breakdown of Unknown Origin

I can just reveal a little bit of my system here. Maybe that’s interesting.

So I was thinking about the outrage over Tlaib, and seeing all these articles where there’s a picture of her face looking like she’s taking a shit. Then I was thinking about how ridiculous it is that the woman who is basically representing Palestine in the US Congress is also an activist for tranny children. Then I saw this video of this fat Arab woman being followed around for minutes by this fat white woman who just keeps saying “chopping off babies’ heads” and I was like “that is the funniest video I’ve ever seen in my life.” And I said: “I can throw all this together and make it funny.”

Normally, I would just take all those ideas and weave them all together in a brilliant tapestry. But this is sort of a challenging one to begin with, as it is just a very weird dynamic. I mean – why is the Hamas lady also the child tranny lady? It’s really more like she’s created as a villain for conservatives than as a hero of some other group. I’m sure there are trans rights people who also vaguely support Palestine in some way, but I don’t think any of them support Palestine enough to stand up to “chopping off babies’ heads.”

Actually, I predict that support for Palestine will largely disappear on the left as a result of this latest propaganda campaign. Pro-Palestine sentiment is a relic of when the left was anti-war. They’re not anti-war anymore, so they only support Palestine against Israel because, in theory, the Palestinians are helpless brown people being oppressed by evil “white” people.

We shall see.