Brandon Responds to Documents Conspiracy by Singing Bon Iver’s 2007 Hit “Skinny Love”

Previously: Brandon is Apparently Going Down

“I told you to be patient, I told you to be fine,” Brandon told reporters this week, finally responding to questions about his secret documents conspiracy.

“In the morning I’ll be with you, but it will be a different kind. I’ll be holding all the tickets, and you’ll be holding all the fines,” the aging and totally senile president added.

“All your love was wasted, so then who the hell am I?” this person concluded.

NBC News:

The White House sought to deflect criticism that it is withholding facts about one of the biggest debacles of Joe Biden’s presidency, taking questions Tuesday about batches of classified records found in his home and an old office.

A White House official, Ian Sams, spoke to reporters Tuesday about documents dating to Biden’s vice presidency — the first time the White House has solicited questions about the classified materials. Although he offered little that advanced the public’s understanding of the matter, the mere willingness to address questions was itself a departure from the initial response.

Biden’s Democratic allies have faulted his handling of the controversy, calling on him to be more forthcoming about how the documents wound up in his Delaware home and a think tank in Washington, as NBC News reported last week.

The whole Democrat machine moved against him all at once.

No matter how many times you see this happen, it’s still impressive the way they are able to coordinate these things.

It’s very beneficial to the Democrat machine that they don’t have any ideas and operate purely on the party. Having zero belief in anything and no ideas is somewhat of a detriment to them in elections (maybe), but elections don’t matter anymore.

Sams, a senior adviser to the White House counsel’s office, said in the briefing that because of an ongoing Justice Department investigation, the White House is limited in what it can responsibly disclose. Officials are trying to publicly explain what happened without compromising the federal investigation — a difficult balance to strike, Sams said.

But legal experts raised questions about the White House’s reticence. At issue is whether the White House kept quiet about documents that had been stored improperly in hope of sparing Biden the political fallout from such a disclosure. A law enforcement official said the Justice Department has not instructed the White House to stay silent about the facts underlying the investigation.

NBC News legal contributor Andrew Weissmann, a top prosecutor in special counsel Robert Mueller’s probe of former President Donald Trump, tweeted, “There is nothing about a DOJ investigation that legally prevents someone under investigation from speaking publicly.”

Weissmann! He’s back!


Hey – don’t get wise with me, Weissmann, you ratty Jew.

It’s so funny that he of all people is in the media now attacking Joe Biden.

Deals with the devil and so on.

It’s just wild that the media-believers are going to go along with the crucifixion of Joe Biden over the most retarded nonsense anyone has ever heard of.

They supported this guy Brandon while he was totally destroying America, now they’re going to walk that all back and say “yeah but he did the secret documents in his garage though?”

Most likely, Joe Biden is going to announce that he’s not seeking reelection, and then this story will go away. It’s just so obvious that it only appeared because he was refusing to step aside, and once he says he’ll step aside, there will be no more use for this story.