Hudson Yards Creates New Attendance Rules for the “Vessel” After Wave of Suicides

The “Vessel” at Hudson Yards looks like it was designed as a suicide destination. Just looking at pictures of it makes me want to kill myself.

New York Post:

The Vessel at Hudson Yards will reopen Friday after a four-month shutdown following a rash of suicides — but you won’t be able to climb it alone.

Three visitors in the past year jumped off the 150-feet-tall structure, a collection of 154 interlocked staircases.

Rather than install taller glass barriers on walkways of the vertical sculpture designed by Heatherwick Studios, the new safety plan has three elements to protect visitors.

Guests must come in groups of at least two.

“Vessel was envisioned as a shared, immersive design experience. Requiring visitors to attend in groups of two or more significantly enhances the safety of the experience,” said a representation from Related Companies, Hudson Yards’ owner.

The three suicide victims all came alone.

What does “suicide victim” mean?

I’ve never heard this term before.

In addition, security staff will be tripled. And, “We are implementing enhanced guest engagement and screening procedures to detect high-risk behaviors,” the rep said.

As part of that, there will be National Suicide Prevention Lifeline messaging in a sign at the entrance, and messaging developed in partnership with the Born This Way Foundation, Lady Gaga’s nonprofit mental wellness organization to help troubled youths, on Vessel tickets.

Ah yes, a sign from Lady Gaga is going to make people less likely to kill themselves, I’m sure.

As they get that song “Poker Face” stuck in their heads, their spirits will surely rise and they will totally forget about their desire to end their existence.

But seriously: the solution to suiciders making a mess outside the Vessel is to install a clean and safe suicide booth.

People who can’t tolerate this brave new world we’ve created with feminism and the coronavirus have a right to dip out.