If you thought Jesus Christ was your Lord and Savior, you simply could not have been more wrong.
Your Lord and Savior is the staff of hospitals that are protecting you from the ultimate doom virus, which is always seconds away from killing us all.
Medical workers save your lives for free (excluding the salaries they collect). The only thing they ask of you is that you watch their TikTok dancing videos, which they create to blow up steam in between piling up corpses from the millions who are dying every day from this virus.
They also ask – if it’s not too much trouble for you, as you sit at home safe in your house while they are literally playing Tetris with corpses because there is not enough room to store all these tens of millions of bodies – that you take a little bit of time to watch them dance naked through the street.
This is also something they do to blow off a little bit of steam in between wading through piles of corpses.
A medical worker de-stressed — and disrobed — in a piece of street performance art in Times Square on Monday morning.
“I’ve been working for six weeks and I’ve seen a lot of death, so I wanted to mix art and costumes to relieve my tension,” the topless woman, wearing an oversize reflective feline mask and holding a kitchen knife, told The Post.
“I did it to relieve some stress,” she said, asking that her identity be shielded more than her chest.
The woman said she works as a physician assistant in a New York City hospital.
It was a beautiful dance by a beautiful savior.
She had Times Square all to herself, because medical workers have bravely ordered all of the businesses closed, and with godlike selflessness, ordered that everyone but them take an indefinite vacation in their houses.
Immediately afterwards, the selfless woman returned to what she was doing just minutes before her performance: rushing up and down hallways trying to save as many lives as she can as people drop dead left and right, and it is left to her and a few other brave women to build Jenga-style towers out of the corpses in the parking lot.
If you think this looks satanic, what with the knife and the horned mask, the nudity and the fact that she is doing this in the most famous square in the world, which is now completely empty, then I will simply ask you: who are you to question the metaphysical nature of your very Lord and Savior?
Without her, you would be dead. All of you would be dead from Covid-19. There is a thin dance line keeping you safe, and how dare you question anything they do?
Medical workers are risking their lives every second of every hour to keep you alive. They have a right to ask that you give back just a tiny bit and watch their dances.
Watch this one right now – if you don’t, that is nothing short of blasphemy.
The hospital videos keep on coming. pic.twitter.com/Z6k5xnWil6
— Vertue (@VertueCo) April 16, 2020
My only request is that medical workers would inform us more about the specific ways they want us to worship them.
I’ve set up a prayer rug, and every day I pray five times facing my local hospital, begging the staff there to protect me from viruses. I’ve also ordered boxes of various vaccines from India, and every morning I inject 10 of them straight into my neck, while saying my Hail Nurses.
Hail Nurse,
Full of Science,
Dancing is with thee.
Blessed art thou among essential workers,
and blessed is the fruit
of thy needles, vaccines.
Holy Nurse,
Mother of Safety,
treat us patients now,
and at the hour of our virus infection.
I just wish there was more I could do for my Lord and Savior, the hospital staff.