Doomed Peck: FIFA Bans Luis Rubiales from Football for 3 Years

“Peck Gate” is the 2020s equivalent of the OJ Simpson trial.


FIFA’s Disciplinary Committee on Monday said it had banned the former president of the Spanish Football Association (RFEF) Luis Rubiales from all football-related activities for three years.

The soccer chief kissed Spain player Jenni Hermoso on the lips without her consent after Spain won the title in August in Sydney in a 1-0 victory over England. A week later, FIFA provisionally suspended Rubiales.

What FIFA said about its decision“This case relates to the events that occurred during the final of the FIFA Women’s World Cup on 20 August 2023, for which Mr. Rubiales had been provisionally suspended for an initial period of 90 days,” said a statement from FIFA.

Rubiales came under pressure from members of the national women’s team and Spanish politicians for his behavior. He eventually resigned as president in September, despite having previously insisted he would not do.

FIFA did not publish details of how disciplinary committee judges reached their verdict. However, it did say they had investigated charges relating to “basic rules of decent conduct” and “behaving in a way that brings the sport of football and/or FIFA into disrepute.”

In addition to the kiss, Rubiales was criticized for grabbing his crotch as a victory gesture while seated in an exclusive section of seats, close to Queen Letizia of Spain and 16-year-old Princess Sofia.

This is basic “men are not allowed to exist” material.


He should move to Russia.

They play soccer, don’t they?

Or would he have to get into hockey?

The actual answer is that Russia was banned from FIFA 3 days after the Ukraine invasion, because FIFA is the global morality police AND a football organization at the same time. It’s sort of like how the company that made Metal Gear Solid is also a casino gambling company. So he would be able to work there, but when you’re at his level, it’s not really the same thing if you’re banned from the international league. Though it would send a strong signal, especially if in every game he would just walk around the stadium and initiate serious make-out sessions with random women, kissing their necks and all of it, in front of TV cameras – and then walk over and take selfies with Putin giving the thumbs up.

People would see that and say “ah, yeah, okay – now I understand why the US is so obsessed with fighting a war against Russia.”

They fired the coach too, right after he helped them win the World Cup. Women have no gratitude.

Snake Baker contributed to this article.