Late for Work? Technical Problems, Brain Tumor, Depression, And Also Why Do I Even Work on Sundays?

I’m not having the best week, frankly. There have been some hard things, on and off line. I won’t go into it.

I will say the donation drive was very depressing. But I’ve already said that. I’m just gonna have to… I don’t know. Whatever.

I’ll just drink and forget about it. That solves all problems: alcohol.

As you know, I also have a brain tumor. That’s fine. I didn’t want to live to be old anyway. But if I’ve only got a few years left, always with this headache, I would really like to get some things done, and… I’m not really getting those things done.

I’m also sitting here wondering like: why do I even work on Sundays? I might stop doing that. Or maybe just write one thing to be posted Sunday.

It says in the Bible you’re not supposed to work on Sundays, but I asked the priest and he said it’s not really a big deal. It’s the only one of the ten commandments that isn’t repeated in the New Testament. But it’s also probably healthy to take a day off work.

I’ve worked every single day for ten years, so… I don’t really think that was responsible.

Hopefully, there’s a legacy here that lasts after my death, which is hopefully coming soon. But I need to put some things together, organize some writings, have my ideas all collected together in a formal way.

I might start doing a podcast.

The problem is that co-hosts get harassed by the FBI. I made some really mean jokes on the internet, so now no one is allowed to be friends with me.

Could I do a podcast alone? Probably not. Maybe an anonymous co-host would work. But I don’t really want to cause people problems, you know?

But I like podcasting and people seem to enjoy it. I like writing better, but I also like rambling with my voice, even though I’m maybe not great at it.

My health is largely stable, I’m just sleeping at irregular hours, and I have this constant headache. I’m taking some pills for the headache, which probably shouldn’t be mixed with alcohol, but whatever.

I’m comfortable with looming death. I joke about it happening next week, but it’s more likely going to be a few years. I don’t think it should affect my writing negatively. There were a lot of great writers with brain tumors.

I have a lot of good things to write. This was just a bad week. All around, a very bad week. Nb4 “Sunday is the first day of the week” – it’s actually really not, regardless of how they print the calendars. So, tomorrow is a new week, and I will try harder, personally and professionally.

We have to complete the mission.